school

If We Were Having Drinks: Back to School and Hurricane Season too!

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 2 Comments

Ack! What’s up people! You scared me! Traci just startled the mess out of me when she tweeted my old post just now. She’s a wonderful woman who shares my content even though I can be rubbish at producing it. The link above is to her site, which gives me happiness at the very least every Tuesday because she is the author of Tarot Tuesday!

The Tarot is fascinating and at the same time frightening for me. My family had quite a few dabblers into the world of magic and when you screw around with stuff you don’t understand well…

Do I believe in magic? Absolutely, 100% wouldn’t even deny it. It’s even in the Bible guys. Have I had unexplainable things happen to me? That’s an affirmative.

So I have a healthy respect for the magic and people who use any part of it. I love reading about it. Traci has some wonderful posts about that and the natural world and her photos are breathtaking. I can barely aim a camera.

But I digress!

So this past week it has been just comfortable enough out I could entertain the thought of having an herbal tea. NC is hot still and will be hot for a long while yet. At least two more months. While the rest of the US may be drinking pumpkin spiced things I’m still enjoying my lemonade.

This past week has been a roller coaster of emotions. It’s causing me stress. Never make promises you are unwilling to keep. Not ‘want to keep’ or ‘unable to keep.’ Not. Willing. That’s about all I can say as ambiguously as possible.

I’m absolutely knackered. I stand everyday when I’m not at school and yet when I return it’s like there are invisible weights strapped to my legs and arms. I come home every night feeling like 7 hours of sleep won’t be enough.

Besides the exhaustion that inevitably happens during a first week at school, we now seem to have our yearly trial upon us:

Ah yes, hurricane season has more than arrived and already, we have a big one heading our way.

I have been arguing with Ru for the past few days about evacuation. There are cons to evacuation:

  1. We might not actually need to leave.
  2. The roads may be closed and we cannot return.
  3. If they close schools and we left but reopen them and we are stuck elsewhere… it could be messy, job wise.
  4. Can we afford to board the cats for a week? Or more?
  5. Will our home be safe when we are gone?

At the same tome there are pros to leaving:

  1. We will have power.
  2. We have two places to stay for free (just have to board the cats).
  3. Our son, who worries about the hurricane and staying, will feel safer away from all this.
  4. I want to see M and D! (Okay that sounds like I want a hurrication and I do not)
  5. People who love us and worry about us won’t be so worried if we are inland.

So while the lists aren’t a perfect match, I just want the assurance that if it seems bad we will go. Yes we were fine the last couple of times. It was horrible to be without power for three or four days. It was certainly livable and nothing like what others have gone through.

I don’t know the answer but I am seriously upset that it takes hours if arguing with my husband for him to realize all I want is a “maybe.” If things look to go bad, will you think about us leaving for awhile? Menfolk. Humph!

Ah yes! Circling back to school here is my classroom:

As it says, color me happy! My room looks pretty good this year! Although a few students mentioned my classroom didn’t look clean (well you convince the janitors to come mop then, cause I don’t have any luck) I think it looks nice!

I have been writing a lot. I know you cannot see it in here but I am 10,000 words into my book! I took down my Clockworks Prologue and Chapters 1&2 because I want to make a go of it.

I am going to do a big old rough write and get the whole thing down. I only change things if as I go along I need to change for consistency. Something may not be detailed enough. Somethings maybe overly detailed. Some of the dialogue maybe a bit stiff too. Shes not quite human so being flat at first makes sense… but what if I don’t evolve her personality properly?

I’m just starting out. Right now all that matters is I’m getting it down.

Once I finish, I’ll probably marinate on it a bit and then go through it again. Then I’ll need some grammatical help. Let’s be honest, in the USA we aren’t taught the finer points of the English language. Just as I started out in school, they started testing. So I’ll need some help with that. I have a friend that’s helping me now but, it probably wouldn’t hurt to have a few folks look at it… and beta readers!

I also want a proper cover. Something probably expensive, knowing me. That’s just how I roll. If I’m going to do it. I DO IT. This may be my only book. If it is I want to say I love all parts of it even if 3 people read it and only read it because they love me.

It’s all very exciting. I am dreaming about it I already have 3 encounters with plot points circling my brain, I just need to get there. I already think there will be a few “as the weeks went by I…” to help me with that. My biggest fear is being boring. Like I take to long to describe what’s going on.

My other fear is of course, no one will like it. It’s a kind of police drama romance set in a sci-fi magic fueled future that’s a bit dystopian. So maybe there’s a genre for that? Who knows.

I also need a pen name. Back in the day it was Piper Thames cause I love England and it was a prominent geographical feature in many historic romance novels I read as a teen. (And I loved Charmed because badass magical women are awesome) I came up with that pen name when I was 17. I’m not sure that’s a good name anymore… how does one decide on a pen name? No seriously, how?

I’m just impressed I hit 10,000 words. It’s novella sized and it isn’t even done yet!

Of course I also have to juggle family, work, and soon soccer and cub scouts. Ah to be a mommy.

At least CDubs is a pretty happy kid. That’s the most important thing.

My boy had his first day at school last week as well! It was a staggered entrance apparently. He goes full time this week and I hope once all the kids are there, he does okay. He had fun on the day he went. I can only hope he keeps doing well. I’ve been trying to get him to do abc mouse and we have workbooks, but those aren’t as fun.

Well… I have to go out away our hurricane supplies and make my son his first Nutella sandwich. Here’s hoping he likes it! You know kids and new things…

I hope to catch up with you all soon! Be blessed and enjoy your week!

First Week Back: Changes

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 1 Comment

This week has been so many things: nerve wracking, scary, hopeful, challenging, somber, tiring, physically demanding…. and yet, here we are at the end like all things the first week back does not last forever.

I knew Monday 10 minutes into work that there were going to be such huge changes this week. I decided after a new staff member introduced themselves at the first meeting and then said, “and it was nice meeting you all but I just got word that I’ve been transferred again,” that I had to capture my feelings each day.

(I had some issues with my website, so this post was finally able to be uploaded a week late! It’s no one’s fault per say, just a very odd glitch!)

There were so many changes on Monday. We had a new Assistant Principal, 7 “new” teachers (transfers), “new” YDS teacher, “new” ESL teachers, we lost a Gym teacher to the Science teachers (he was a science teacher first, then was PE teacher for a year, and now a Science teacher again), “new” Librarian, (our old Librarian was a classroom teacher that was learning to be a librarian and is back in the classroom) and some teachers have changed grade levels and subjects to boot!

On a personal level, I was informed that I would be a Music teacher solely. This is… it was disappointing to hear because I transferred to my current school because the Bands here/there were so large. The teacher needed help because 70 kids at once can be a lot. We were just starting to understand how to co-teach Band and really seeing the fruits of our labors. So it was a little bittersweet to know it’s done for now.

Financially, teaching music is a pay cut. This is frightening because of that Disney downpayment we made back in June. It became more frightening when Ryan called to tell me he was not longer a Band Director as well, cutting his salary down by a nice chunk as well. Again I am thinking of this huge trip that I have already sunk $1000 into and now I’m like “…. what will we do?” It was A LOT all at once.

But. As I sat there, processing as a person does when they receive such news, many things went through my mind:

One, I am a kick butt teacher. Hands down I know music. I may not be a savant or anything, but I can teach music to kids. So changing to teaching Music full time and not Band full time will not be bad for my students. They won’t get a subpar, blah education. (Though I need an upgrade on my Music materials, technology has changed a little in 4 years!)

Two, WE HAVE JOBS. I have NO IDEA if I will be able to say that by day 20. I don’t. People made some comments to me today about “showing them we need you,” and “we have to give them no reason not to question,” and “I’m trying to leave no doubt.” Which made me feel a little doubtful about my lasting 20 days even though they REALLY need me to teach Music or the other resource classes will be at 30 to 35 kids each for each resource teacher. So they need me so far and thank the Lord that I have a job!

Three, we can be more economical. Ry and I should really practice portion control when eating anyway… so this makes that and little things like watching our pennies a real thing. We HAVE to. I’m not losing the Disney money we put as a downpayment, I’m not going to worry about what CDubs may need for school, because we can do this and be better with our money. Because thank the Lord we both are still employed.

So, instead of crying like I would have done in the past, I sat there and problem solved…. because y’all I am an emotional crier. Very Happy? I cry. Very Sad? I cry. Very excited? I cry. I. CRY. So I’m kind of impressed with my brain/face/tear ducts because I handled this sudden change for us both really well. I didn’t jump to outlandish conclusions or anything.

While I was having this period of growth my co-teacher, a veteran teacher of 20 years decided to go up front and explain what making me a Music teacher really means for my salary. They didn’t know up in the front office. They are just trying to make things work and keep as many of us as possible and I completely respect that. I also really respect and adore my co-teacher for fighting so I could teach one Band class this year, thus making me a BAND TEACHER again. That’s right, I am still a Band teachers as long as I teach one class. They picked the smallest grade level where me teaching Band as well would not effect the numbers in the other rooms (Art, computers, and PE). If just my co-teacher had 50 kids in Band everyone else, including me, would teach 10 people per class. So we are shooting for 35 to 40 kids for this Band class. Thank you co-teacher for going to bat for me!

I called my husband with the news, (if this works out which it sounds like it will) then we are only out a chunk of one salary not two! I also remembered we have after school clubs via the 21st Century Grant and I get paid for that, and we don’t have to pay for daycare anymore (duh).

Okay, so I can do this and I STILL HAVE A JOB. (Do you detect a theme in my gratefulness?)

That said, I still had a lot to get ready but at least I’m in the same room! I decided to totally redo the layout now that I have more time to set up as well.

My co-teacher’s husband came by and helped us move all the large cumbersome stuff and my co-teacher got her room almost completely together! (I guess I’ll have to think of another name for her since we won’t truly be co-teaching all day like we used to)

I’ve still got a lot to do… but it will be worth it. The theme this year is bright colors and rainbow like.

So I felt like it was a very emotional day… then my husband called and it’s been decided that he WILL be a Band teacher after all too! At least they hope the schedule is set in such a way that he can. They got him some help so there will still be Music at his school and Band. Now I know for a fact many people pulled that together and I will be praying for them and are truly in a state of thankfulness for that miracle!

Whew! That’s just day one! I’m hoping the other days feel smaller… and less emotional!

Thank the Lord I am still employed! Thank you! God is so Good!

Tuesday was nothing compared to Monday. Monday felt like a whole week and Tuesday was like a long morning!

We had a meeting about our individual teacher websites and mine is pretty awesome. I’m proud of it and I only had to adjust the welcome image, the schedule changed (oh shoot I need to edit the footer on the page I forgot!), and hide the Spring Band Trip page (since it is not even Fall yet!). Then we could go to our rooms.

I moved a lot of large plastic containers full of books and decorations. I set out new things and old. I vetoed some fun items in lieu of some more practical things and locked up some instruments for Music. (They are just to fun and tempting to leave out!)

My teacher friend helped me hang a dry erase board in the back of the room. I am rubbish at anything using your depth perception. Stairs? Bah! Driving! Nope! Hanging or drawing anything straight? Yeah right. Also she is like the strongest woman I know, so she strong armed my cheap IKEA drill into that temporary wall (it’s solid and we have permission to do these things but it’s not original to the building and can be removed easier that a true wall) and made those screws do right! I am excited it’s now up!!

My teacher friend is all done with her room, and it looks great. My room looks like the plate of food a kid doesn’t really want to eat. You know how they move stuff around and it just looks like they are eating, but they aren’t? Well my room looks like it’s coming together but it’s not. There is still stuff everywhere. It’s crazy.

At least I have applied pink grapefruit wipes to all dusty surfaces, hung a impossibly large calendar, and found the highlighters!

I also found out at tonight’s board meeting that since July 30th forty five more people noped out of the county or retired. So that means 145 people left. So now just 45 more jobs are left to be cut. I am still praying just in case… extra prayer never hurt anybody as far as I know.

I have to ask myself, why do I move all my stuff? It’s so much work. Never mind the layout might actually be better this year, it’s a lot of moving things. My co-teacher K is done with her room. I’m still wondering if I should add more color.

I learned about some policies today that we need to implement and had a large brainstorming session with multiple teachers and so veteran teachers online. I appreciate their insights so much. It really takes a team to solve a puzzle sometimes.

Thursday was a lot like Wednesday in that I moved a lot of things around, melted some skin off my hands (high temp glue guns are no joke), swept, hung more decorations, covered up an obsolete heater with music paper making it look like a weirdly placed shelf, and just tried to make a beige classroom look like a colorful, energetic, fabulous classroom! I may have actually sought out other teachers on purpose and spoke with them. *shock*

Friday we had an Arts Department meeting at one of the large high schools. It was again, a lot of changes. Our department overall was tasked with cutting, individuals/positions. You could hear a pin drop when this was announced. However, 15 jobs were eliminated because a great deal of folks did not come back, another classroom, or retired. Five of those positions were open and simply closed for the time being. While it’s sad to know that people left, and worse there are schools missing an important element of the Arts or maybe a reduction in the Arts, people’s hands were tied here. It’s not like we had a choice and we are lucky we are valued as apart of the educational team. Thankfully PSRC is looking to educate the whole child, and sees the wonderful things we do.

We had an item exchange (I was so excited about this) and we were able to share things we may not use as often and get things we needed! I was blessed to get some new art supplies! I like to use visual art, in my limited way, to enhance what I teach in music/band. You can draw what the music sounds like to you, you can sketch what emotions the piece causes you to have, you can share your feelings and thoughts in artful ways! Writing is so important but sometimes our kids need another way to express themselves. (Especially 5th graders bridging that gap between elementary and middle school. Drawing and writing prepares them for writing more detailed works later!) so I was happy to walk away with 500 sheets of recycled newsprint paper!!

Then we spoke with our new teacher leader for middle and the leader for high school. We solidified dates, gave opinions for what clinicians should be hired for student learning events, opportunities for field trips came up and! My co-teacher and I will be the clinicians for the Middle School Honors Band group! How cool! We will pick out the songs they will be playing, teaching them for 8 hours and we will be conducting at the big concert at the RCC Auditorium. It may not seem like the most amazing thing to other people but this is stepping out into the spotlight for me. I love working with kids, but the stage still give me pre-concert jitters… not to mention my peers shall be all over the place watching me conduct, observing my teaching style, judging my every move… possibly… *shudders* It will be good for me, it will. It helps instead of one person, we will trade off and have two!

Co-teachers once again!

I would be lying if I said my thoughts were calm and assured. I hope that the county continues to see the value of my position and of course me as a teacher. I think I do very good things, dare I say, wonderful things with my students. My classroom is starting to really come together and I am really feeling more settled this year. I hope that feeling is an indication of how the school year will go for me! Any thoughts, prayers, well wishes, and good vibes are appreciated! Now I have to look forward to open house!!!

If We Were Having Drinks: 20 Days

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 2 Comments

How are you all doing? It’s about to be the second week of August which signals for many USA citizens that school is either started, or starting soon. I wonder which you are or if you live somewhere else and your schooling schedule is different?

If we were having drinks I think I would have one last lemonade, a yellow one, that’s more sour than sweet… that’s how I like them you know.

But what to tell you? Well… my spirit has been heavy lately. I haven’t been sleeping well at all and I’ve been having headaches. I don’t think they are tumor related so please don’t worry on that score. I am sleeping very badly, devouring books, and breaking out like I am 14 years old all over my chin and cheeks. One starts to reduce (pimple) and another just grows. It’s bull-hockey (I.e. crap, unbelievable, bollocks). I didn’t have breakouts as a teen so I feel like I dodged a bullet. Acne should now let me go on dodging that bullet. Don’t come for a sneak attack in my thirties, that’s just mean.

The thing that has got my spirit heavy is work. Why?

You see, R-County has been hit with two MAJOR hurricanes in the past, 3 now, years. I’ve posted on here about the destruction. Each time we were out of school for around 6 weeks. Buildings went down, flooded to the roof, people were displaced and died.

It hit the school system too, students had no where to live and no money to completely start over again. This happened all over the county. People couldn’t live in hotel rooms for years. Some tried, but eventually you just have to leave and try to start again.

This has had far reaching consequences. While I am hopeful these consequences will stay away from me… nothing is assured in this life.

I had written this huge doom and gloom post about how the school system is in heavy debt and employed 190 teachers over what our population now needs, thanks to the hurricanes. I worry about our stability. I worry that we put this big down payment on a trip to Disney in the winter. I worried, because we don’t have savings and there are a lot of reasons why.

So my heart, and my spirit has been heavy.

But then Saturday afternoon I managed to fall asleep. This is a rare thing lately, to fall asleep during the day no less. I had a splitting migraine and I just turned out the lights and took some medicine and knocked out. I maybe slept for 3 hours? I don’t know.

When I awoke, I felt a lot better. I started, as ineffective as many seem to think it is, to pray.

Now I don’t pray like other people I know. I don’t kneel well, my knees pop out of socket when I do. I don’t always sit either, or bow my head. I know you are supposed to show supplication and certainly there are times I do but usually I start off arms folded or hands clasped and then I get into whatever I’m praying about and I start to speak aloud. I gesture with my hands as I speak and sometimes I rant and sometimes I cry, sometimes I just talk like there’s a heavenly receiver wherever I am and it’s obvious He can hear me.

I know that’s not particularly normal but, that’s how I’ve always done it. I’ve gotten in trouble too, people will walk in on me doing this and I know people think I am crazy as the day is long. But it helps.

So I lay in the bed, cause while my migraine is not a migraine any longer, I’m still a little tender in my skull, and I start speaking and gesturing at the ceiling. I know, so strange. And I’m talking out all of my fears. I have SO many.

I have to tell you, a peace came over me once I realized I just had to give up this pointless worrying. I can’t change it. I can’t make things work out. I can’t bargain or argue a better outcome but I can give all those worries to God or Heavenly Father to deal with.

I just have to give it up. I can sit here and make myself crazy when I cannot logically control the outcome.

So, while there is still an underlying nervousness, I am just going to trust that things work out.

I report for work for the next two weeks and then when I have officially worked 20 days with students I will either receive a notice my position has been cut or I won’t. This is a state law, I don’t think the county is so cruel as to lead people on when there are jobs elsewhere to be applied for. They simply do not know who is to be cut once the retirees, people who are quitting, or those moving jobs are settled.

There is only so much we can do.

In the spirit of what I needed, I napped again today. I cuddled with my son, did the dishes, and talked with friends on the phone. Yes, there never seems to be a way for me to sleep well the night before I go back to school. I feel the same sleeplessness will occur the night before the students return. I just hope to remain positive, and wary of only the things I can control and what is important to the now, for now.

Of course I will do my job and do a wonderful job in doing so. I will decorate the heck out of my classroom even though that’s a lot of work that may be for nothing. I am going to continue to do my best because I can control that.

I hope that if you are having similar fears about things outside of your control that you are having a better handle on it than I have had!

Now, it’s officially the first day back. It’s 1:40AM on Monday and I am going to attempt to fall asleep before 3AM. Today I should be able to move things around my classroom and do all sorts of things.

So I must say thank you for that last lemonade. Thank you for the talk and the share. I do hope we can do this next week, and every week after. I’m going to do my best to not hide every little thing and bottle it up this year. Let’s see how that goes!

It Happened Again: Why Teachers Having the Summer off is Not us Being “Entitled”

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 2 Comments

Sigh it happened again. I made a little wistful comment and suddenly… Bam! I’m a brat. But my question is, why do we as educators take flack for this CONSTANTLY.

What am I talking about?

Summer “Vacation.”

In my country, the USA we teachers at public schools work for 10 months of the year. We receive around 8 or 9 weeks “off,” in the eyes of the general public during the hottest months of the year. The kids go home and so do the teachers.

Let’s take away the summer jobs and workdays, and any professional development someone may have during the summer (Which is, by the way a separate check because check out the next truth bomb…) teachers are unemployed during the summer.

Yes, you read that right. Teachers are unemployed during the summer. We don’t get summer off we are unemployed.

It’s always been this way

Why? Well there aren’t any kids to teach so, we have to go home. It’s like any seasonal job. A friend of my husband’s works lawn care up north. In November, December, January, and February sometimes he is “laid off” from his job. It’s hard to do lawn care in the snow.

It’s hard to teach kids at their houses over the summer.

“But what about the paychecks?” Well check this, most teachers allow the government to hold a portion of each check they earn for each of the ten months that they are physically working. Those two months off we don’t get “paid,” we get the money we allotted to be set aside returned to us.

I’m not working for free, I earned this cash. Last year.

A lot of teachers have contracts for a certain number of years they are employed. If you work where I do, I sign a contract from August to June. That’s it. Effectively I am fired every year and if I get a contract before I leave that school year I have be rehired.

No joke.

I am contracted on a year by year basis. Thank God I do my job and I do it well.

Now. Why do kids need summer break? Why not make us work 12 months a year? Since everyone has such problems with our summers off?

How do your kids feel at the end of the school year? Tired? Drained? Worn out? Disheartened? Or maybe they are excited. Ready for the year to be done. Happy to move on.

Why can children feel this and adults cannot? Teachers may love their jobs but we can get worn out too. When we aren’t working it’s not us sitting by the pool everyday throwing our money around like ballers. We are taking time for self care, doctors appointments, spending time with our own children whom we like you have seen 4 hours a evening then they sleep, and a hour or two in the morning. I miss my son and like you, I have to work. I need to be with my family too.

But I think the worst part is when, we say things like, “ahhh summer is almost over… 😮” and people jump on us like we said we support slavery and abolishing the constitution… and while the USA may seem to be favoring deviant thoughts lately, trust me having feelings about summer doesn’t make us evil.

It makes us human. I know teachers aren’t allowed to be human but unfortunately the system is flawed and until we are all replaced with AIs well, I guess you’re stuck with us.

So we aren’t “lucky,” we weren’t “granted a paid vacation,” and unless you signed a contract you are NOT GUARANTEED a job every year at the end of the school year. We have unpaid summers. It’s apart of our job description, much like your job descriptions are specialized for what you do.

Please stop riding our butts about ours. Let us be human and say things like, “gosh the summer is almost over, *sigh*” and commiserate with us… after all, we will be teaching your kids soon and if summer made you batty well… think of 10 months 8 to 12 hours a day for us. (And yes we all love our children! Biological and otherwise! You can still love someone and need time away from them!)

Sunny Summer Fun!

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 2 Comments

Sorry I haven’t been around or posting in the past week. I have been and currently are on vacation. I know you aren’t really supposed to tell people when you’re gone, it’s not safe. However, we will be on our way back sooner than later, and I have a moment of peace to sit and collect my thoughts.

It’s been a good week and some, we’ve gone to the beach a lot.

So much so that I’ve developed a sun burn on my legs (I haven’t sunburned my legs since I was a little girl). It itches! I have a rash on both hands and feet, it’s torturous. I’m trying not to itch but man! It’s hard to not sneak in a scratch here or there.

CDubs has been the king of many sandcastles and we even took a trip to Medieval Times. We all agreed we that the horses were beautiful but Pirates at the beach was much better!

CDubs is afraid of large bodies of water. It’s called Thalassophobia. He has an absolute meltdown freak out if you walk him to a lake, or a pond. The ocean is the ultimate evil and he cannot imagine even letting one little wave splash the side of his foot in passing.

So this is why it was so huge when we got him in the pool this week. He has learned to propel himself around without latching into us like a suffocating vine! Look at my boy go:

https://youtu.be/eKt2pS9yMmc

I am very proud! He can’t wait to wake up and go to the pool every day. So that is super cool, I think!

We’ve been able to sleep in a bit too, and enjoy the company of family, for the most part. We’ve done a lot of fun stuff for the little guy. He loves puzzles!

It’s the lighting. My husband is not wearing sunglasses inside!

And like I said the pool, the beach, and we’ve eaten all sorts of kid friendly foods. While I am sure my cholesterol is all over the place… and I’ve had so much dairy I think I may fall out… it’s been nice to see everyone eating so well.

Truly it has been a low key sort of vacation. Today we will be going shopping for school clothes for CDubs. Then, back to the pool. I’ve begged off so I can do laundry and clean up the room. Just because it’s not my house doesn’t mean we trash the place!

Here’s to vacations and enjoying just being!

Have you all been out and about adventuring over these last few months? Feel free to drop a link to a post or video of your adventures! I’d love to see what you are up to that I may have missed! I’ll go comment too, honest!

Look at This Stuff… Isn’t it Neat-ish?

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 6 Comments

Woah, my last post was in January. I promise that wasn’t on purpose. I’ve just been extremely “blah.”

Why? Lots of reasons. Sometimes teaching can be very hard. Sometimes I don’t see the point of continuing on with it, but at the same time I am good at it. I used to love teaching but I believe there was a lot of naïveté involved. I also had a lot of people around me that encouraged this. So when the veil came off, as it were… well. I just finished my 8th year. I finished an I’ve made decisions.

I really need to bring my lunch to school every day

3.

That’s it really. I can’t afford to not do these three things this next year. The rest of the things I worried about this past year can bite me. I ain’t doing/thinking about/giving power to next year.

The next thing I kind of strong armed us into is…

WE’RE GOING TO DISNEY!

If you were told, and I’m not sure if you were, we promised CDubs we would be going to Disney during the year that he turned 5. Well we butted it right up to the end there but sometime during the holiday season we will be driving down to FL and taking two days at the park! I’ve never been. CDubs is still at that magical age, and I know he will have such a good time.

I’ve heard why going at that time is bad, and why it’s good. I’ve been told a lot of things and gotten such good advice. I’ve also gotten rude, disrespectful comments, assumptions about our finances and all that.

I think I told everyone that I have 3 jobs? I had two school jobs this past year and then of course TUPPERWARE! So while I’m not rich, the money for the trip is being drawn from the “extra income.” But even if it were not, the nerve of some folks, you know?

I mean my mom has even said, “he should be 10 when you go,” yet they never took any of us to any Disney park… so I am not sure where her information/experience is coming from.

Now. This is our first trip. This trip is 100% about CDubs. We will be going on all the little rides. We will be meeting all the characters. We will be getting autographs and pictures. We will not be doing anything us adults want to do. It’s all about him.

We love everyone but this first trip is for him, only him and we three. I know when my family discovers that we are doing this trip, there will be some that scoff at what we’ve planned, or well meaning folks that want us to change what we are up to, and may even want to tag along but for this one an only time will it definitely just be us. Besides that being all we can afford, when we add more folks there are more expectations, more need to allow for others wants and wishes and that’s normal. That’s wonderful. The second time we go I am GOING TO HARRY POTTER WORLD. We will do meet ups and shows and rides on Space Mountain and all that jazz. But not this time. This time is for him.

Now being to articulate that, and hoping our families don’t think we are assholes, that might not go over well. I will do my best to get them to understand our point of view.

But I’m excited. We have the meals, the photo plan (again this one and only time I want perfect beautiful professional photographs. I’m partially blind in both eyes. My pictures come out 1 in 3 shots. On the 2nd trip I can jack up all the photos), the Disney park bands…. I’m getting us family shirts for the two days at the park. Maybe not red and green but something cute. We are getting ears and we are just doing all we can and it’s just exciting.

We already made our first big payment and there… there flew the extra money I earned… and the bonuses from teaching Band… bye mulah….❤️🖤 ah well it is worth it!

Now the title of our post, though I suppose Ariel does indeed fit into Disney and the trip quite well. No you see, I have taken the time to gut my child’s bedroom. I didn’t ask him this time what to keep. I am the one that plays with him the most. I know what he ignores. Four, 13 gallon trash bags of toys, stuffed animals, and happy freaking meal toys are gone to the thrift store. I moved the layout a bit, moved Ryan’s old kid table upstairs and his Pirates sports locker (thanks to Ryan’s parents who save a lot we have what we need for CDubs), took out the chalkboard and the only thing in the toy box are the tiny Calico Critters and their minuscule pointy objects and homes. I took half his blocks, my son had 5 containers of various building blocks and paired it down to 3. I took all of the baby books I had no idea were in there, three 27 gallon bins full of books to go to the attic…

I have dreams of giving CDubs’ children a library: “Congratulations on the birth. Here are literally hundreds of books. Read to your child. Now.”

And then I took his old tiny art box and upgraded it to this huge one. I bought him new colors, the white paper he has been asking me for, new construction paper, pencils, a drop cloth for the floor, I mean… this kid has an art studio now. He said he wanted to be an artist so, here you are baby boy! His stuff is neat. I love his hand drawn stuff but here is a digital piece:

It’s a house… or a rocket… or you know something freudian.

I mean all parents think they have a little Picasso. I get that, but there is no reason he can’t learn as much about art and pursue that as a career if he wishes when he is older. Right now it’s easy. Later there will be lessons if he’s serious.

Anyway, I digress. Then I attacked all of the bathrooms with a foaming peroxide spray that made me gag and scrubbed the blasted baseboards (no baseboards in the next house. Ceiling molding, sure. Baseboards and cat hair together just super sucks.).

I’ve washed the shower curtains new again, (if your washer has an agitator load up some towels a bit of bleach for germ killing and wash on warm, the inside plastic curtain and the other one will be quite clean. I figured that out when I was a kid! Works pretty well and we don’t buy new curtains… ever. Unless like I guess they got stained with mildew?) and lifted vent covers and you know, just done a bang up job of erasing the last 10 months of general neglect from those areas of the house. I mean it’s been okay but this is like blinding white, smells like chemically goodness, clean.

Confession time. Because of the hoarding nature of my parents home, the more crammed and cluttered my house is, the more anxiety I have. Bleach, cleaning sprays, and soap like smells they calm me.

I hate to clean cause I’ve got things to do but man I will happily stand outside after I am done and bask in the smell… which probably isn’t healthy… but I’m getting older so it’s the little things in life, right?

I cleaned out a closet which… isn’t clean but it’s lost about 1 bag of stuff we just didn’t need.

Next is the linen closet/tool closet (apartment living so no garage? Store it with the linens. It’s not like we have a lot of rooms anyhow!), the master bedroom (fancy, lol), going through my closet, hallway, stairs and then…

DOWNSTAIRS.

Is anyone helping me? Well, Ry is going laundry and the romance novels as rewards are helping. So there is that.

By August I plan to be 100% done and doing my best to maintain. CDubs is going strong on day 3 or 4 of keeping his room clean. He earned his rock badge for cleaning up after himself this week:

Like his haircut? He got lice at daycare and I got the clippers out!! Looks like a right little gent!!

and he is excited to do another badge the next.

Which brings me to my next big thing:

I just bought two clear backpacks on Amazon today, big old writing pencils, (the fat ones. My son is a lefty and he needs all the purchase he can get! -Did I use that right, I’m trying to expand my vocabulary.) a pencil box, and I already got him a shark/pirate themed lunch set for school.

All I need is that class list and I am ready! I hope he is. He told me he doesn’t want to learn to read. I told him that I will always read to him even if he learns, so don’t worry. We will see how it goes.

I think that’s about all my updates! Thanks for reading this long but fun for me to write post! I hope to get back into blogging again! Here’s hoping for some stability in that as well!

If We were Having Drinks: I’d Ask for a Rain Check

/ elodiegarrowaybooks / 2 Comments

I feel like gum on the underside of a desk. I feel all sticky and gross and no one should ever want to touch me. I feel like someone tried to scrape me off the underside of the desk as well, but I’m still clinging on.

I’ve been sick for about a week and a half. The last time we spoke I told you I was experiencing breast pain. Well it’s better but they still hurt. I used to feel nothing and now I am aware they are there. The pain is anywhere from a 4 to a 2. Compression helps, I don’t need the heat anymore and the Bactrium has run its course. The infection is gone but something is up. The doctor has decided it’s hormones and I’ve decided he’s a quack. The man never read my chart guys. He asked me stupid questions that were in the chart. I answered one wrong on accident and he didn’t even notice until I realized he had no idea to correct me. Then suddenly he knew what it was, and it may very well be hormones. I just don’t like how… uninformed he is. How he has no idea what he told me last time, does read the notes so I have to repeat myself and how patronizing he is when I do. I don’t like how he tells me to go pick out my next appointment and they put me in a room and decide without consulting me what day and time. So I’m not going back unless I need an emergency mammogram again. I am not a medical professional but you should I don’t know, read my blessed chart.

In other news I am in the slump on the continuum. It says first year teachers but that’s utter bollocks. It’s every year. They just don’t want to scare the newbies:

Mines is a little different, usually I just hit Disillusionment around February and hold on until April then rise up towards May and June. In June I reflect and July and anticipation hits in August.

I think I had a earlier drop thanks to being sick and the breast cancer/something bigger issue in December. I mean we were talking Lupus at one point. Blessed depressing that all was.

By the by “blessed” replaces all curse words and makes me sound even more Southern than I am. However blessing everything is much better than having my son inform me the raspberries are “Assberries,” because you know mommy has the mouth of a blessed sailor. You also have to say it southern, it’s not “blessed” it’s “bless-ed.” Give it a try, people will still look at you like you’re nuts it just won’t be while covering the ears of their children.

It just sounds better.

On another note I’ve lost 12 lbs on my diet officially, and I am blessed starving.

To say I am irritable and in need of chips, cheese products, ice cream and the like is an understatement. I never eat sweets and junk a lot before the diet but I miss my daily bag of chips. If we don’t buy another tin of mixed nuts soon, someone may die.

I don’t mind the salads (my phone is so shook by the diet changes that it auto corrected salad to sales. Poor dear). I don’t mind more veg in my diet. I care that the salty goodness is gone.

Sigh. Blessed diet.

But Ry’s blood pressure is down to 150/100 and that’s like a big deal (guys he was constantly in stroking out levels. No one understands how he is alive). He celebrated with a salad and a snickers bar. Then I told him no more snickers bars for the next 3 months. Such is life.

I am excited that at the end of the month I will be paid for the first time since before Christmas. The next 5 or 6 months are going to suck money wise. We have to do something stupid with our money for daycare. We will be getting less for our dependent care and having to scrape together more then we will be “reimbursed” in the fall when he is in school. It’s dumb. I don’t get why we can’t keep getting what we had but for 6 more months and then stop. It’s dummmmmb. Ah well. It is what it is.

Well I am off to bed. Got school tomorrow and a concert coming up and I’m sure there is a benchmark in there someplace. Enjoy your week!