In Which LinkedIn Becomes a Place for Professional Booty Calls

It’s been about 24 hours since the following has occurred. I woke up, and like most people under 50 I took to the restroom with phone in hand. I can’t drink coffee in the morning, so I’ve switched to social media to wake me up.

As I sit upon my porcelain throne, not on LinkedIn, my phone chirps to let me know something is receiving a message. I look for my little red 1 notification and find it is in LinkedIn.

I barely use LinkedIn. It’s for job hunting and interviewing for me. I click on it to refresh its feed every so often and congratulate folks on work anniversaries.

Anyway, I see I have a message in there and a man from the next town over who teaches music has sent me a Hello:

At this point, I believe it could be anything. I look up who he is on his profile before typing and see he is technically a colleague. I bet I work with people in my county who know him. Anyway, I figure we want to sell something, borrow something (for his kids) or collaborate on something. Us music folks do that. However….

I mean, is this the 1800’s? Am I supposed to simper? To gaze coyly through my digital lashes back at the man? I realize perhaps he did not know I am married. It does not say I am married on my LinkedIn and why should it? It’s a professional platform. Facebook used to be a professional platform and look at it now.

So anyway I figured I’d shut this down. It’s the morning and I am tired. Let’s nip this and move on. Easy mistake, right? (Plus that picture is like 6 years old)

Except….

Now. Now. I did not respond after this point. I called my husband over to read this and he says, “this guy must have been hacked.” (Ah my charming good looks via 5ish years ago cannot be the reason dear husband? Lol)

“Why?” I ask, genuinely wondering where this idea of his has come from.

“Well this is a professional community. I think I’ve worked with this guy before. He’d never do that.” He says, and begins to brush his teeth.

As I contemplate this, I ask, “Well if you do know him, message him and let him know his account is hacked!” I say. Why? Because then he can say, “my wife received a message from your LinkedIn account and I think you’ve been hacked brother.” Which really gives this guy a warning to back off, that we speak to one another and maybe, just maybe, my husband is right and the poor soul has been hacked.

So my man goes online and it is NOT the guy from the next town that he knows but another guy that of course is in our circle of educators. Curious, I take to FB. The picture I discover matches the LinkedIn and I see in his photos a picture of him and possibly and young son standing over a casket of a beautiful woman. Now. I don’t know if that’s a family member but the comments lead me to believe it was his wife. Recently.

Now I don’t know. Was it a booty call? Was it just a bereaved husband who needed a talk?

Except why start off with “beautiful?” Why when told I am married continue on? Why not immediately say “no no! You misunderstand,” instead of the cocky side eye and all that?

Or maybe I don’t know the whole story and I’m just not supposed to. Maybe he still is married in a sense or maybe she is alive and well and that’s his sister.

Is it my place to take it any further?

Should I posted his name all over the place?

I think, if he had messaged any further and was disrespectful, I would have seriously considered it.(When I said “Married.” And instead he responded that I was a mean bitch, or what have you, I might have)

If he was married, did I have an obligation to go out and hunt down his wife in solidarity and sisterhood?

I might have. I might have looked her up and seen, do they have kids? Would my posting ruin her life or the lives of her kids? Would it be better to message her my meager evidence on FB?

Or would that even be my place?

My investigations left me with more questions. Before I investigated, I asked a friend and she said if he had been rude, absolutely go out and make a fuss but since he wasn’t, leave it alone. You don’t know whose lives you are impacting as collateral. Do the children deserve the backlash that the parent receives? Would you as a wife want your husband’s infidelity splashed on Twitter?

Maybe not. I’d like a private message that he was a dog (think Bill Clinton), personally.

Whatever his motivations, I’m glad he understood what I was getting at. He didn’t message me again. He didn’t look me up on FB or try to be friends in other ways. He got the message and cockily let it go, but let it go he did.

If you received such a message what would you do? I’d love to know in the comment below! Hope everyone is doing well, and I’ll talk to you again soon!

In Which I am Confused for a “Passing White” Person of Color

I have a strange story for you today. Remember I look like this:

It’s important.

A woman who is very popular with the teaching community online shared a graphic today that said “What do these words have in common? Tacos. “Namaste.” “Spirit Animal.” “Tribe.”

She was warning teachers to not display cultural themes in their classrooms. She said it was appropriation and had no room in the classroom. There were various arguments about how there is a difference between appropriation and appreciation or if you were of a certain race yourself (a young woman was Spanish and felt she could decorate her classroom with as many Spanish cultural items as she wished, thank you) what was “allowed.”

I understand where they were coming from but it was to the point where people said reading tents (teepee or non) in the classroom were tacky because the “indigenous students might get upset over the appropriation.” That they had to be careful with song choices for the other children (I assume children from other countries or possibly of other races…?) We have to decorate to make everyone comfortable and be careful to not represent the wrong things….

At this point I thought maybe people needed to realize that some of the things they were saying weren’t very PC even though it seems we like that was there overall goal. Some people were trying so hard to make sure that “we didn’t assume Spanish children wanted to listen to Spanish music or that black children only enjoyed rap.” (How about exposing them to all sorts of music? Ever think of that!?)

I mean I am one for celebrating all races and cultures, but saying we couldn’t celebrate any…? Because the comments got to that point…I should have just kept scrolling but then I couldn’t resist commenting.

I have some indigenous people’s in my background (Osage). I’ve hung art in my room before that I’ve enjoyed from who I consider, though a few generations ago, my people. I have in the past received grief over this. Being a white lady. If I even suggest my heritage without showing pictures of my grandfather, father or my sister I often get very angry remarks from students. I am white. I get that. But there were indigenous people in my family not to long ago. We still tell stories. If you told my dad he wasn’t Native American he would (and has) flipped his shit. He thinks the DNA testing is bullshit now because mine came back very low…on the indigenous peoples. (It’s because woman are XX and men are XY so some of his DNA did not translate to me cause I have lady parts. No really it’s true. I’ve got all the Italian from his mom but not so much native from his dad. But I digress)

(My sister is Beautiful and obviously got all of the indigenous genes.)

So I decide, based on this, to ask these ladies and gents what happens if you come across a white teacher with all of these things, and you find it’s a nod to his or her heritage? Like my indigenous art, let’s say a teacher’s classroom is filled with Spanish artifacts decor and what have you, because she is a third Iberian? What then? Do we just go forth guns blazing and talk about their cultural appropriation and all that? Would you believe them if they told you they were anything other than white? Would it even matter? What would you do then? How do you advise such a person decorate?

The reply, the only reply, was:

I really didn’t understand the comment. What is BIPOC? White passing…. wait what? What sort of mess is this noncommittal acknowledgment?

So I googled and I think she decided that I was the “I” in BIPOC, and therefore a person of color passing as white…. and I stopped because I don’t think I have the right to that label. Why did I need a racial label in order to answer my comment? This is an erroneous conclusion to be sure but I have to wonder if this polite shutdown is common. She obviously did not want to take the energy to comment.

As white people do we (and yes, I am aware that I am white) just champion causes one dimensionally? Cultural Appropriation IS bad. So that means we can’t have culture around our classrooms? I am like 1% North African. So not African really. So I can’t teach about Africa? You certainly wouldn’t say I could because my 1% makes me African! I cannot have a Djembe for my students to look at and play? So they can feel something and see something and connect to something from Africa. Do I need to have a higher percentage to be able to talk to my students about multi cultural music? I mean really?

I get not decorating your classroom in hokey shit. Let’s not go overboard. But why not fly all the flags, have world maps up, artifacts from all over the world and teach the children about other cultures? Why not?

If you paid the artisan from that specific country, did your research and actually taught why would that be bad? Why not use a sombrero from Mexico? Why not a drum from Africa? Because we’ve seen them too much they have less cultural significance?

I do know one thing. I am a pale pasty woman of multiple origins. I don’t even think I can say I am Native American any more, no matter who grew up on a reservation (grandfather supposedly). Labels are weird nowadays. Passing as white indeed.

I think we are both a little too pale, lol. (And we were such babies in this picture!)

The Business of Business

If you have visited my blog since June 2018 (bless you! 💜) you may have noticed my new page that informs the blogverse that I am a Tupperware Consultant!

And while that’s all well and good, for the past two months that has been my focus.

You see, I decided that I would start out right, and I would spend my summer really focused on learning the business. I watched videos on how to input sales, I went to online training sessions, I read word documents detailing sales techniques, and I learned how to throw online parties.

I created a closed group where I could post exclusive deals to my customers, have mystery host parties, and be able to take orders from friends and family using PayPal and Facebook Pay (which I had to learn to use). I also sprung for a website so that if someone didn’t feel comfortable with sharing their payment information (which I totally understood) they could order with me but through Tupperware’s website.

So I set it ALL up. There was nothing I didn’t do to try to learn everything I needed to be successful!

And then… I discovered that even having a great product, knowing all sorts of things about warranties and uses for products, and having giveaways and playing games doesn’t mean instant wild success. That I still could make many costly mistakes…

Okay it wasn’t that bad!

But I have missed sales goals. I missed paying off my kit via the company by $130. I have accidentally given people free shipping, I have given away Tupperware when I should have said the prize was contingent on a base order of say $10… thus putting myself in the red by paying shipping and tax. I have NEVER made a mistake where they were the ones who lost money, it has always been myself and my discounts, my commission that has suffered for my mistakes.

However, I have the best customers and friends. There are more experienced Tupperware consultants. Heck, they could just go to Tupperware dot com and order whatever they want that way (minus special consultant sales). However, they have allowed me to learn my business with them. They have not complained when I’ve double checked their order (because I did make mistakes in the past!) or asked them if they wanted to host a party. I appreciate that.

So while I still have a lot to learn, I appreciate my customers so so much. People are choosing to shop with me! That can only be positive! It’s is a great start!

When I started this business, I saw a lot of Tupperware I wanted. I saw the 25% discount and I saw the chance at a second income. I vowed to do my best and give this business 6 months of my time and then decide: should I continue on or not?

I do not regret the time and energy I have put into my business so far. I am so thankful for the support I have received and I cannot wait to see what the next 4 months have in store for me. (I do regret I was away from my blog but the time to learn had to come from somewhere!)

The future… the future is still a little murky, but I am enthusiastic!

At the very least, I’m having my first home party (like they used to do!) at the end of August! But who knows how things go in November? I might even hold out to December! Heck this might even work out to be a true second job!

Here’s hoping!!

Trying Things Tuesday: Nurx

Think about the last time you went to the doctor’s office. (A lot of you are blessed and live in a place with free healthcare so our imaginings may differ.) How much did you pay to see your doctor? How long did you wait to see the doctor? Did you fill out a long questionnaire only to have the nurse check over all the answers once they called you back, and then realize the doctor never really looked over your answers?

Have you ever gone to get a check up for birth control? Did they ask you questions like, “Why do you want to take birth control?” Only to think, “because you clown I’m not looking to conceive right now!”

Think back though, when you asked for this form of contraception, did they do a vaginal exam? Did they look you over and pronounce you fit to start a contraceptive?

For most of us, the answer is no, they just asked a bunch of questions. Then you paid your copay (or not) and left.

What if it were easier? What if you could fill something out during your lunch break at work, while taking a breather at the house, or dare I say it, on the can?! Then, a licensed physician looks over the questionnaire, checks your insurance, and prescribed you a form of birth control over a period of a week but you never had to go to the doctor’s office or make an appointment?

Crazy sounding, right?

Except is not. Really think to the questions I posed above. Do you need to physically see a doctor in order to obtain contraceptives?

Well I have to tell you that I don’t. Even with an endocrine issue and amenorrhea I was able to speak with a doctor ask questions and never leave my house.

Sounds like some black market woo woo, huh?

Well it’s not! Check out Nurx:

It’s a simple little app!

Nurx is an app (and website) that allows you to log in, answer questions that you would answer at a doctor’s office. You are then matched with a physician who goes over your medical history, listens to your preferences, and writes you a script for birth control. It’s not just pills either (you’ll just have to explore your options). This takes a week or so to accomplish. While you’re waiting, you can fill in your insurance information. My script ended up being covered by my insurance but many people find that their contraceptive choice is affordable (no, really!).

My doctor looked at what I wanted, listened to my time constraints and asked questions what I found to be comfortable. Then she set me up with a 3 month batch and I received my first package:


And then my second!
I have been pretty happy with nurx and I confidantes say that my pills are the real deal. Remember, I admitted to having amenorrhea. Without the proper hormones in my body, I don’t have a period. Even on my pituitary medicine that controls my hormone imbalance I still cannot have a period. The only way I have been able to have a period in my adult life is with the side of birth control. I’ve had doctor office prescribed and bled. I’ve had nurx and bled. I’m not pregnant, so I tend to think that these pills work. It’s not a sugar pill hoax. It’s a wonderful, revolutionary way to save time and money while practicing family planning.

Unfortunately, nurx is not available in every state in USA. It never hurts to check and see if it is though, and if and when it will be available to you! I am unsure if they ship globally but for more information on nurx please visit their website!

As always, it’s up to you what you decide to try out, and I am just a happy customer. I am not being paid or endorsed by this company, these are just my opinions.

Media Monday Vol.12

It’s Media Monday! I hope you all are feeling refreshed and ready to attack the week with gusto! If not, I hope these positive, inspirational, and funny media selections help your week start off right!

Cats…Make the world better!

Some Musical Humor

And some wisdom from Tibet

I hope that you have enjoyed this week’s Media Monday! Much love and joy to you!!!

Media Monday Vol. 11

It’s Media Monday! I hope everyone is having a good Monday so far! As always, Media Monday is a weekly post that has funny, uplifting and or positive content from around the social media realms. I hope you enjoy this week’s selections:

Kim has an STD…

Lava

Spring Cleaning

The Book I wrote the Forward for

This was Life Changing… for Adam

Science!

I hope you enjoyed the media fun today! If you have something to share, please comment below and I will feature it, and a link to your blog next week!Be blessed and enjoy your week!

Media Monday Vol. 10

It’s Media Monday! How are all of you today? I hope you are all doing well! I have three things to share today, which I hope you enjoy or have a opinion about! Without further adieu:

Lol, I have been a survivor of many assassination attempts!

Which reminds me, my cat people, thank you for seeking me out:

it’s the small things that make me happy, lol!

Next, a story about a beloved icon:

I’m not crying, you’re crying!

I hoped though brief you enjoyed Media Monday this week! Is there content you’ve come across that you feel needs to be shared? Please share with us in the comment section below! Enjoy your week!