If We were Having Drinks: I’d Ask for a Rain Check

I feel like gum on the underside of a desk. I feel all sticky and gross and no one should ever want to touch me. I feel like someone tried to scrape me off the underside of the desk as well, but I’m still clinging on.

I’ve been sick for about a week and a half. The last time we spoke I told you I was experiencing breast pain. Well it’s better but they still hurt. I used to feel nothing and now I am aware they are there. The pain is anywhere from a 4 to a 2. Compression helps, I don’t need the heat anymore and the Bactrium has run its course. The infection is gone but something is up. The doctor has decided it’s hormones and I’ve decided he’s a quack. The man never read my chart guys. He asked me stupid questions that were in the chart. I answered one wrong on accident and he didn’t even notice until I realized he had no idea to correct me. Then suddenly he knew what it was, and it may very well be hormones. I just don’t like how… uninformed he is. How he has no idea what he told me last time, does read the notes so I have to repeat myself and how patronizing he is when I do. I don’t like how he tells me to go pick out my next appointment and they put me in a room and decide without consulting me what day and time. So I’m not going back unless I need an emergency mammogram again. I am not a medical professional but you should I don’t know, read my blessed chart.

In other news I am in the slump on the continuum. It says first year teachers but that’s utter bollocks. It’s every year. They just don’t want to scare the newbies:

Mines is a little different, usually I just hit Disillusionment around February and hold on until April then rise up towards May and June. In June I reflect and July and anticipation hits in August.

I think I had a earlier drop thanks to being sick and the breast cancer/something bigger issue in December. I mean we were talking Lupus at one point. Blessed depressing that all was.

By the by “blessed” replaces all curse words and makes me sound even more Southern than I am. However blessing everything is much better than having my son inform me the raspberries are “Assberries,” because you know mommy has the mouth of a blessed sailor. You also have to say it southern, it’s not “blessed” it’s “bless-ed.” Give it a try, people will still look at you like you’re nuts it just won’t be while covering the ears of their children.

It just sounds better.

On another note I’ve lost 12 lbs on my diet officially, and I am blessed starving.

To say I am irritable and in need of chips, cheese products, ice cream and the like is an understatement. I never eat sweets and junk a lot before the diet but I miss my daily bag of chips. If we don’t buy another tin of mixed nuts soon, someone may die.

I don’t mind the salads (my phone is so shook by the diet changes that it auto corrected salad to sales. Poor dear). I don’t mind more veg in my diet. I care that the salty goodness is gone.

Sigh. Blessed diet.

But Ry’s blood pressure is down to 150/100 and that’s like a big deal (guys he was constantly in stroking out levels. No one understands how he is alive). He celebrated with a salad and a snickers bar. Then I told him no more snickers bars for the next 3 months. Such is life.

I am excited that at the end of the month I will be paid for the first time since before Christmas. The next 5 or 6 months are going to suck money wise. We have to do something stupid with our money for daycare. We will be getting less for our dependent care and having to scrape together more then we will be “reimbursed” in the fall when he is in school. It’s dumb. I don’t get why we can’t keep getting what we had but for 6 more months and then stop. It’s dummmmmb. Ah well. It is what it is.

Well I am off to bed. Got school tomorrow and a concert coming up and I’m sure there is a benchmark in there someplace. Enjoy your week!

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