Sometime last week, the over used, over publicized “Thigh Gap,” came up. One would think the craze would be dead but alas, even I rember my first thigh gap encounter….
About 12 years ago I was working in the Junior’s department at the local Dillard’s. I was helping a young blonde teen find jeans. She was, I remember, a good looking girl. As she was checking out with her purchases, she was bemoaning the fact that her thighs touched. I remember telling her my thighs never have experienced not touching… In fact:
Okay, I didn’t say that, but I remember her giving me this look. The look that said, “of course you wouldn’t understand.”
She left upset at the unfairness of her lack of what I now know as, having the Thigh Gap.
When I was young, I noticed I didn’t look like the other girls. They wore mediums and I wore extra large. I was told often I was fat or that “if you just lost some weight- you’d be so beautiful!”
My father took me aside, without my thin sister, and told me that I was very beautiful and smart. He said it was a shame because the kind of beautiful I was wouldn’t be recognized. If I had just turned out pretty, no one would notice it, in fact because I was better than average looking, they would try to change me. Beauty had to look a certain way and to find out that beauty could be big…
He told me there was a model called Twiggy that changed everyone’s ideal of beautiful, and that someday we would come back around to curvy is beautiful but; it wouldn’t be while I was young.
Then he told me I looked just fine as I was, and that as long as I ate healthy, went for long walks daily, and kept active, I would be fine.
While I have nothing against the gap, I understand the science behind how they form naturally. I also understand how they can be achieved unnaturally to the point of sickness. That I have an issue with.
I’m not going to be a big girl blogger who waves her “I hate skinny people” flag in the air high above common sense.
I used to think that way (put down skinny people) when I was picked on and didn’t understand my father’s advice. It was definitely a reaction to the bullies and their comments about my size. They couldn’t understand a 5’11” 160 pound person as being the correct size when they were told they should weigh 120 (but they were 5’3″). They didn’t understand.
I’m a freaking adult now, with insane health issues. A gap is the last thing on my mind!
What I want for everyone is for them to be healthy. Talk to your doctor about your weight concerns. Exercise and eat well. Look good and feel good because you are a worthwhile person, not because we can see 5 inches inbetween your thighs. That’s not where your worth lies. Being healthy period thin or thick, is what matters. Love yourself. You have things about yourself that you cannot deny are beautiful. Is it possible that all of you could be beautiful too?
Please remember we all come in different shapes and sizes. It’s natural. Trying to get every person to conform to one body type is not only impossible but unhealthy. Diversity rocks, and we have to embrace that.