Deep Doodoo…


Do you want to hear a first time parent oopsie? It should totally make you laugh, I know I did.

So my bestest man friend M (Godfather to my Son along with his amazing partner D) came to visit for Ryan’s Birthday.

M and Ry are downstairs chatting and I had just carried my then, 2 month old son up to change his diaper. I could tell he had peed and it was time to change his diaper!

So I get him undressed, I get him stripped of his cloth, separate the insert from the pocket, and I turn around to him peeing all over the carpet.

Boys do that. So I jump to it and clean up the pee and I wipe him down. I apply his booty cream and put a fresh diaper under his bum.

Then he starts to poop. A lot. So I let it run it corse and I take that diaper away. As I do, he pops again on the pad. This is gross liquid poop, bright orange and foul.

So I holler for my husband to come up and help, I can’t change him on the dirty pad.

So I pick my son up… And I hold a tiny, little cloth square to his bum and hold him naked on my chest and lower abdomen.

You have to know what’s next. Maybe it would help if you know what I am wearing. I am wearing my favorite new white and black dress pants. I have on a cute black top with very lovely jewelry on. Oh yes and I am barefoot. On carpet.

Let that soak in…..

Okay, so my husband is taking his sweet ol’ time chatting it up with M. I am bouncing our naked son in my arms, cuddling him, talking softly to him and then….

He let it go, let it go all over my nice new clothes… (Sing it with me!)

Poop everywhere. That cloth square I held on his bum? Completely defeated. My shirt? Covered in orange poop, my pants streaked orange and black. The rug and my feet were warm…. Very warm. And gross, so very gross.

I shriek. I can’t help it. CDubs giggles. Ry dashes up the stairs. M darn him, is down right cackling in glee (he has twin nephews) and I hear his laughter bouncing up the stairs. Ry bursts into the room and sees the poop on the table, floor, and me….

And he stares. And I start to laugh, a huge body shaking laugh. He joins in and together, we clean up.

Sometimes, that’s the only way through such things.


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